We used to have a lovely pub round the corner from us. A real local. The best thing about it was that we could go in there with the dog. You could even order a bowl of water for the dog with your drinks.

Then it got taken over by a big brewery chain, and the rules changed. No Dogs. I recall the first time I found out about this.

I went into the pub with the dog and went up to the bar. I asked for my drink and the barman said "Sorry, No Dogs".

"Since when?" I asked
"Since last week", he replied. "New management."
"What about guide dogs?" I asked.
"Guide dogs are OK", he tells me.

I nod down at the dog (a rough collie) and say to the barman "She's a guide dog"

He looks down at the dog. "No she's not" he says.

"Yes she is" I assure him.
"No she's not. Guide dogs are labradors" he insists.

I keep my eyes facing forward and , at the same time, reach down to feel the dog - in the same way that a blind person would.

"What do you mean 'not a labrador'? What have they given me?"

It was a god bit of cheek, but ultimately didn't work.

The reason why establishments, and a lot of parks, don't allow dogs is because some dogs are badly behaved. They run around crazy-style, whilst their owner fruitlessly shouts "Bad dog!" or "He's ok, he just likes you".

Rather than say "No Badly-Behaved Dogs" though, it's easier just to ban the lot of them.

So let's take this logic even further. Some people in pubs are badly behaved. They shout, swear and start fights. So why not just put up a notice saying "No People". Then there won't be any trouble at all. There won't be any customers either.

So it is with bikes. Because one or two idiots terrorise everybody by riding like hooligans through the park, or take a filthy two-stroke across a farmers crops, all off-road bikers are hooligans and up go the "No Dogs" signs.

Out with the maps, looking for somewhere else to ride. Will keep you posted.

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