Lots of talk with The Missus about bikes, what kind of bikes, and getting bikes that are right for what I need to be doing. There was even some petulent "gonna get me a 2-stroke and do Erzberg" at one point as I recall.

Now The Missus, having lived with me for long enough, knows that this thought will live to the grand old age of about 3 seconds. However, she also knows that responses of things like "don't be silly" will tend to make the idea hover and stay there until, next thing we know, I'm doing Erberg on a 2-stroke just because somebody told me I couldn't.

So I got my copy of Trail Bike Magazine through the post. Page 14, bottom left hand corner, is a little sidebar. In that little sidebar it says that:

"AJP's new alloy framed trailie will shortly get a boost in the power stakes with the arrival of a big bore kit in Spring '08. Built by a company in California, the new powerplant is available complete or as a kit and will give the current 198cc air-cooled SOHC lump an extra 62cc to play with."

Now there's only two people in the world right now who are considering such an option - and the aforementioned engine is currently en route from the USA - being fitted into a PR3 by about mid-January. Either there's more than two of us looking at this, or one of the TBM hacks has been talking to Martin.

Either way, it's nice to read something in the industry press which is a scoop - a titbit of knowledge - about something that you are part of.

I was also watching a guy called Chris Pfeiffer on YouTube (just search for his name). The guy was doing trials - climbing over cars and stuff - on a HP2 Enduro. That's a 220kg HP2 enduro, for the record. There is nothing this guy cannot wheelie.

The point here being that it's not the bike, it's the rider.

One of the events I'll be looking to enter this year is the Cambrian Rally, round about October. Here's some footage which somebody posted on the Trail Bike Magazine forums - you will piss yourself:



As I say, it's not the bike.

Talking with my ageing friend this morning (or, more accurately, "bleating at" my ageing friend this morning) about Rosie and insurance and stuff.

It made me think of a book I once read, back in the day when I had aspirations of getting qualified as a lawyer, called "How To Do Things With Rules". It explains how lawyers, and the law, take rules apart and make them mean completely different things.

So, for instance, there's a rule in enduro that says "you must wear a ACU-approved helmet". Very sensible rule. What a lawyer would do is strip it apart in a way similar to the following:

• "you must"
  No arguments with this one really. Not a lot can be done.
  
  
• "wear"
  Bingo. We can have some fun with this one.
  
  
• "a ACU-approved helmet"
  Again, not a lot can be done with this one. A helmet is either approved by the ACU (it has a gold or silver sticker) or it's not.

Looks like we can get up to mischief with the part of the rule that says "wear". A lawyer would look up the word in a dictionary (e.g. the definition of 'wear' at dictionary.com):

• wear: to carry or have on the body or about the person as a covering, equipment, ornament, or the like: to wear a coat; to wear a saber; to wear a disguise.

Hmm. It doesn't say anything at all about the helmet having to be on your head. So, for instance, I could ride around with it on my arm and still be "wearing" it. The marshals would disagree, but according to the letter of the law ...

Anyway, the Santa Clause:

"Underwriters shall not be liable for loss or damage caused by theft unless: between 10:00pm and 6:00am when parked at your place of residence the motorcycle is kept in a locked building."

My fight with the insurance company hinges on which interpretation is chosen:

1. if you have the bike out of the garage between 10pm and 6am - ever - then you can never make a claim or theft - ever;
   
   
2. you cannot make a claim for theft if the theft was between 10pm and 6am.

The first of these is a very literal interpretation - i.e. the letter of the law - it is exactly what it says. Read it again. A very deliberate wording whereby the insurance company, if they ever find out that your bike was ungaraged overnight, refuse to pay out for theft.

Notice, also, that it doesn't just restrict it to theft of the motorcycle from the house. If it's interpreted literally, then it covers any theft anywhere in the world at any time - all that's needed is that the bike was ungaraged between 10pm and 6am at any time in the past.

The second interpretation is a little bit more "common sense" - and its probably how you and I would read it - but it's not what the wording says. In fact, you have to work hard to come away with this interpretation, even though it's the most common-sense and logical one. The insurance company are saying "we won't pay out for theft if it happened between 10pm and 6am outside your house, and the bike wasn't garaged".

Which, in a way, makes sense. But, read it again, that's not what it says.

The insurance company, obviously, would like interpretation 1. I, obviously, would like interpretation 2.

Even if we do manage to get the interpretation I want, then we get on to when the bike was actually nicked. It was sometime between 8pm Saturday and 11am Sunday. This includes the 10pm-6am time window they mention. But we don't know exactly when.

This is going to rely on some pretty good karma, and having somebody senior in the insurance company who looks at it and decides to give me a break. What with all the shit of the last 3 months, I reckon we're pretty deserving of one.

I'd have made a good lawyer. I can argue well, can rip sentences to shreds, and can understand complex wording of stuff. Most of all, I get a real buzz out of going into bat for people who cannot go into bat for themselves. I don't like to see bug guys picking on little guys - whether that's in bizz-ness or in life. It's not right.

If I could find a way to do it, and still keep bills paid, I'd love to go get me a law degree and earn a living advocating for people who can't advocate for themselves. Standing up for little people against big people. Dakar first though.

In the meantime, we fight on for interpretation 2. And we hope that karma is watching - helping me to stand up to the big people.

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